You can be cool. Soon...

Hey, why not buy some funny t-shirts? All proceeds go to me and help support my Arizona Cardinals habit. There's plenty of great gear at my Zazzle shop... and more stuff all the time. 

C'mon, you really need a Legalize Crime t-shirt. Seriously...

Defining humor

Humor is good. It's tough to argue with that. But, it's tough to define what is humorous. Some people think I'm funny. But, some people also think Carrot Top is funny. Certainly, no one that I know... but I'm sure they are out there.

Disclaimer: I really do not have it in for Carrot Top; I simply don't like his name. If I were a short person, I'd probably think someone with a name like "Midget Dave" was an ass...

Taste is another thing that's tough to establish parameters. I love "tasteless" humor. Always have. No one dies, no one gets hurt... I grew up on t-shirts from the 70s (man, I miss the 70s) like "I nuke gay whales for Christ" and "Do unto others, then split.". Today, tshirthell is my kind of place. Where else could you get a My Native American Name is Steve shirt? I suppose it's not as funny if you're name isn't Steve, but...to each his own.


Bottom line, if you'd rather be snorting coke off a hooker's ass, proving your allegiance to white flour (no, not white power), or simply wonder What Would Jesus Do (for a Klondike Bar) you need to click here.

Who thinks of these things?

Last night, my wife and I enjoyed an evening out with friends at a Pacers game. While the basketball was mediocre (remember: it was an NBA game), we all had a good time. I thought I spotted Dr. Ruth on the Jumbotron, but it may have just been an old person...

As a member of the human race and someone that enjoys observing others of our species making total twits of themselves hoping to see themselves "on TV", it's always amusing to check out the depths some will go for free shit, like banana shaped stress balls with an oil company logo... or, a t-shirt.

Yet, last night it wasn't the nutjobs spilling their $7.50 Coors Lights for medium white Hanes Pacers tees that caught my attention. Instead, I was mesmerized by the t-shirt gun that fires the aforementioned beefy tees with enough average velocity to kill a small mammal from 40 yards away.

T-shirt gun? What a concept. Next thought: who thinks of this shit? Seriously, who thinks to themselves: "I must develop a gun that needs no bullets, only a folded cotton t-shirt as ammunition"? Was there a market needs analysis for "a big ass hand-held pneumatic triggered bazooka that launches t-shirts into crowds"? I'm both fascinated – and disturbed. 

Well, I'll tell you who: the same guy that decided launching a mere 4 or 5 t-shirts during timeouts was for pussies. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the SABRE, "the world's first and only rapid loading and firing t-shirt cannon." Available online through (where else?): tshirtgun.com

A semi-automatic t-shirt blaster? Wish I'd thought of that. 

I wonder if anyone is developing a laser-guided scope?